Monday, November 16, 2009

Missing something

Have you ever had those times where you were so busy doing other stuff that you neglected to have your quiet times in order to have more time to do that other stuff? A short time ago, I was so busy with things that I put off having my quiet time which I usually do first thing in the am, to devote more time to doing stuff that is far less important. It was surprising how my attitude and general demeanor changed and not in a good way. I found myself getting upset easier and and reacting to, instead of interacting with my family and I questioned God as to why things were getting to me so easily and why would things not just go my way. I immediately wanted to redirect what was happening away from me an onto someone or something else. Paul says that the things he does not want to do he does and the things he wants to do he does not do. This is really true for me too, I don't want to get frustrated and upset at stupid things and I know that it is wrong for me to but I allow myself to do it anyway. I allow my emotions to control me at times and that is very dangerous.

One night I was up pretty late after work and I thought for a moment, if things get this hard (or I thought they were at the time) as a Christian, imagine life without Christ. I actually started to worry and get claustrophobic at just the thought of not having Christ in my life, I realized without Him I was lost and alone and I was so scared at that thought and remembered a time when I was not following Christ and that thought had never crossed my mind back then, I could have cared less and now He is the reason I breathe and without Him I realized I am nothing, I am doomed to a life of seperation from Him and just that thought brings me to the point of tears. The worst thing that could ever happen to me or anyone else for that matter, is to stand before Christ on that day and hear him say to you, depart from me, I never knew you! I am sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I am back on track and having my quiet times again and I feel a thousand times better now because I am closer to Christ. Over the past few years I feel like I have grown so much in certain areas of my life and in others I seem to still fail more times than not.

I went to visit Amy's brother this past weekend and surprisingly, I actually had a good time. We shared and laughed and talked about Christ and what he is doing and how He can turn a bad situation like this into something that can be used for good. He gets to read a lot and has read several C.S. Lewis books and said he has four bibles too that he has read several times over which is encoraging. He also mentioned the letters he has recieved from people in our church and what a blessing they really are to him. Thank you for that, it means a lot to Amy and I as well!!

2 comments:

Amy said...

I am so thankful for your commitment to the Lord and to our family. I see such growth and faith in you, it encourages and helps me so much. I love you!

Jeff (Big Daddy) Salyer said...

Good posting Sam, God is working in you and Amy's life everyday, and that is AWESOME!